What happens after

Life scares me. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like without a life. Would you just float around in the cool night breeze tickling many cheeks and causing people to pull their sleeves down a little more. Or would it just be a dark hole of unknown oblivion. Would it just be nothingness. An eternity of darkness.i don't know. And I won't ever know for quite a while.but I wonder. It keeps me up at night. What if. What if i just disappeared.And then what. What happens after? I always here about God and an afterlife and karma and rebirth. Every religion has something different happen to you after you're gone. So what would happen to me. Would I go to heaven or hell?Would I be reborn as a bird or a tree? Or would I just be endless nothingness? And what bothers me the most is that when I get the answers to these questions that seem to travel in circles in my mind.i'll be gone. I won't be able to tell anyone. So it will just be an unanswered question.that everyone feels like they know the answer to when in reality they don't. No one has proof of what happens. What happens to a soul. They can't prove that it flies away and enters another body or goes up to god. They don't have proof to anything. I don't know what to believe. I believe that there is a higher power.i mean there has to be.science only goes back so much and then it stops.it can't be logically explained anymore. There is no way it could have just appeared. How did everything evolve like it did? There must have been some sort of mastermind that calculated how everything was going to turn out. Right? Things can't just happen. Or can they? Miracles. Are they really miracles?  Is there guardian angels watching over us? Are my grandparents looking down on me? Are they proud of the person I have become? I hope they are because I miss them so much and I remember my grandma being so happy to see me and ask me to sing for her and never stop. Words just flowed out of me like a river and she would just sit there and smile. Her eyes would just warm up my insides and I don't think I will ever forget that feeling. She was always so proud of me and she wanted me to be me. I miss you grandma. I miss everyone who has left. I hope you are having a lovely time with whatever has happened to you. I'll always remember you.i love you♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡