Today

Today is just one of those days. I feel like I can't do anything right and i can't look good in anything . I don't like these days because they make me feel so unaccomplished. I wish I could always do everything perfect, but then that would mean i wasn't actually living life. Life is not about perfection or always looking good, but if it was life would be so much easier. But right now I am sitting here with blemished skin and crazy hair and just feeling down. I feel like today is one of those days when i just need to think.  Just drink a cup of tea and think. Right now I have been listening to the album "The Carpenter" by The Avett Brothers and I am completely in love. It has a folky tone and it just calms me down. Also I am 20 pages into LOOKING FOR ALASKA and I don't know how I feel about it. One of my friends said that it starts out slow and then picks its way through the middle and then is great so I am going to make it through the first couple of chapters to get to the good part. Today I am just going to spend my day reading and blogging and tumbling and singing and dancing and talking pictures. It's also a makeup free day today. My skin needs to breathe. I need to take a moment to stop and breathe. It's February 1. So many things have happened to me in the past month of January. It was the first time I almost fainted in school. It was the first time I realized that I really liked youtube. It was the first time I realized that I loved to sing and that maybe I might have a chance. It was the first time I had ever written a song that I am proud of. It was also the first time I felt a deep self loathe for myself. I have had good and bad things happen to me, but I wouldn't have it any other way because I learned from anything that was put in my way. February is the month of love. I want to learn about this thing called love. The closest that I have gotten to love is between me and Special K cereal (the almond one is amazingly delicious and you should definitely try it. :)) I want to learn about love between brothers and sisters, and parents and children. Whenever love is brought up it is always thought of as a relationship between lovers, but it doesn't have to be. You can love so many other things like family and friends and pets. I feel like that it is a big thing society today. If you are alone for a second you suddenly think you are #foreveralone. No. You have a long life and you can't just label yourself like this. Sometimes people want to be alone and they shouldn't have to always rely on someone else to be happy. If they are like that then it is as if they are just an extra for someone else movie and are taken out only if they are needed. You shouldn't feel the need to be used or be with someone just because you think your lonely whether if it's your group of friends or someone your dating or anyone like that.

  Ankita
Looking For Alaska by John Green. Still in my pajamas. 











"The Carpenter" The Avett Brothers. I am obsessed. Like I can't even. I am not leaving this couch for the entire day. I am set. I just need some tea.